I never set out to become subversive. But I’d have to admit that I sometimes own it. Subversiveness is not actualized by having a private inner narrative (or ordering of “words below” the public context), but in actually trading one’s stories and ideas for ideas and reflections from others. It can become “subversive” if one’s ambient social order cannot tolerate a selectively shared narrative, or if the social order relies on the appearance of harmony and the non-conformant verse appears to aim directly at the structure of the social-ordering per se, or aimed at the processes of the dominant ordering to actually order activity. In short, “subversive” only makes sense as a judgment against stories when viewed from a position of power that feels threatened by its own judgment.
My narrative goal is not about knocking any “particular” social order per se (thought I can and do critique societies, as many people I know are fully aware). My goal is about removing obstructions to human reason, and reasonable human action. I do this so I can think and act; and I gravitate towards others that do the same.
My private thoughts can seem completely alien to some others I must interact with due to the “accidents” of human history as written into the story of my life (and loosely connected sometimes by others). But to me, they are not alien; I can justify them to myself and know from where they come and what holds them in place. These thoughts drive my value system of having a self-identified and self-maintained value-hierarchy.
Those that know me well enough have shown enough thought to see that I can trade stories for stories, or stories for a sympathetic and slightly critical ear, or ideas for a critical evaluation. Those that can think through things, who have enough of a compatible value-system, can trade thought for thought.
Almost all of them I grate upon to one degree or another. I include myself in that list, since I do not consider my value-system to be stagnant, and I find myself constantly listening to my own thoughts to try and refine them.
If one judges me subversive, then I challenge that judging process to introspectively evaluate itself; critically, objectively, recursively if need be. It’s what I do, so before you judge me, judge yourself first.
Pursuit of Value 